Sharing of Meditation Experience

As mentioned in my previous post, I went for a meditation retreat and accomplished better than my expectations. Actually I did not have any great expectations, except to receive teachings, particularly on Satipatthana (the four foundations of mindfulness), from the venerable Sayadaw. Even though I have meditated for a long, long time, nevertheless I felt I need the teacher to teach me everything, right from the beginning. Therefore, I registered as a beginner. There is really no need for arrogance and think so highly of myself. If I had registered as an advanced practitioner, the teacher may assume that I have already got the basics and skip those parts. But different teachers have different approaches, i.e. Pa Auk Sayadaw, Mahasi Sayadaw lineage teachers, U Ba Khin/ Goenkaji lineage teachers, Ajahn Chah lineage etc all of them have some variation. The subtleties matter if you are following a certain teacher, so start right from the very beginning if it is your first time with that teacher.

It was the blessings from the Buddha to connect me with this teacher. It was obviously the correct one for me. He was a no-nonsense teacher and would not engage in personal talks or engage in friendly gestures with the retreatants. If you had any personal issues, you better put that aside because he wants you to focus 100% on the meditation course. No distractions on your personal or private matters. To him, you can take care or these matters AFTER the retreat. But he still demonstrated his compassion and said some metta (loving-kindness) prayers for me. I do appreciate that!

It is said that when the student is ready, the right teacher will appear to guide him. This is really true for my case. I had previously met a Sayalay who had previously trained under Pa Auk Sayadaw lineage. Even though she volunteered to be my teacher and wanted to meet up with me on daily basis to enable me to report to her, it did not materialise. The retreat centre did not arrange the retreat accommodation for me and then I could not find her anymore after that. On hindsight, I probably wasn't ready then. Since then not only have I studied the Maha Satipatthana Sutta, but I had also studied texts from other Theravada teachers, particularly their commentaries or experience on meditation. Now I have knowledge on the approaches of various teachers from the Theravada lineage. I learned from Theravada teachers, because mainly there is a lack of Mahayana teachers who can communicate well in English and who knows in-depth of not just breathing meditation but also the Satipatthana methods. I really would have liked to study under a Mahayana accomplished teacher. But those Mahayana teachers I know are from Zen tradition, Pure Land or Vajrayana tradition. I had been doing Vajrayana meditation for more than 10 -15 years, but apart from gaining improvement in concentration, it wasn't getting me anywhere as far as reducing my mental defilements is concerned. I figured out that visualising external people as Buddhas and deities did not quite reduce my defilements. But it was my fault. I knew I probably wasn't receiving adequate guidance in this aspect. And I did talk to my Tibetan Buddhist teacher about it. Then he advised me to study and read up on the Buddha's teachings. Therefore, I did some research and studied many texts on various Traditions/Schools, including Theravada. When I read on Satipathana, I knew the foundations of mindfulness was missing from my practice. And the Theravada teachers are the main ones that promote and focus on Satipatthana. Of course, there are a few exceptions, such as the late Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh and his lineage teachers. But I felt that Mahayana teachers were not that detailed in their guidance of meditators. For example, in their walking meditation. In Zen interviews, all the teachers are interested in is whether you have managed to get the answer to Zen koans. But they did not teach you how to probe properly into koans, and how does probing into koans fit into the overall Samatha-Vipassana methodology. For Vajrayana practitioners, they seem to be more eager to receive empowerment (or initiations) after empowerment, without any follow-up progress. So, a lot of Mahayana teachers (at least the ones that I knew) were not as detailed and did not have a one-to-one interview during meditation retreats. I am giving some feedback here, with no ill-will intended. So, don't take me wrong. The teachers from Goenkaji, Mahasi and Pa Auk lineage centres were more detailed. Also, there are English meditation books and materials. These teachers are also established teachers and even reputed to have had some attainments (even if it is not Arahant). There are other reasons why I choose to learn Satipatthana from these Theravada teachers. On the other hand, I felt that some Zen Masters and Tibetan Rinpoches (even though they have the titles), they do not give me that confidence in their own attainments. I am sorry to say that. For this particular Sayadaw that I was under, he did indeed gave me the confidence. He was strict with me right from our first meeting. On our last meeting, he was smiling away, obviously happy (at least) with my effort. How different I was comparing the first day and the last day of the retreat. He knew that! I felt that practicing Satipatthana is the right thing to do because it provided me with a fresh perspective on the Mahamudra practice. 

Now the problem is continuity. So far, it is almost 2 weeks after the retreat ended. My focus on the abdomen is getting sharper and less uncomfortable. There is even mini spikes of bliss upon every rising/falling. Despite what the critics say about the Mahasi method not having Samatha, based on my personal experience, I am developing my Samatha skills. If I had the time to do a 3-months retreat, I am confident I can achieve the Jhana states. But the Jhana states alone, is not what the followers of Mahasi method are after. The Jhana state should be achieved together with Vipassana. The knowledge (sampajanna, I think) must be present too, so that it will result in wisdom-insight. 

That's all for now. I started a keen interest in Satipatthana after His Holiness the Dalai Lama gave a dharma teaching on Satipathana to Theravada teachers. You may refer YouTube link   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HTGlhgitzw

Anyway, I did a summary of the Maha Satipatthana Sutta in my previous blog posts, which you may explore here in link below (and subsequent posts thereafter) https://buddha-and-me.blogspot.com/2022/01/maha-satipatthana-sutta-part-1.html

#satipatthana #mahasi #meditation