My Trip to Tibet is in Jeopardy

Sometimes having more money does come in handy. For example, it wouldn't have been such a problem for me to decide whether to go to Tibet on a pilgrimage this June or not. It is because I have limited funds that I may not be able to go. The cost of the land cost is said to be US$2250 and the cost of the Chengdu-Lhasa-Chengdu another US$465. The plane from my home town to KL and to Chengdu is expected to be around US$260 assuming I manage to book the low cost flights. Then there is the additional US$350 that I have to pay for having to stay in a single room (being the last one to join; the rest have been paired with a roommate). And what about donations to monasteries and tips to carriers (I was told to set aside US$150 for this) along the way plus the 10 meals that are not included in the package (say, US$50) and the souvenirs we will be buying (US$150)? What about the Chinese visa entry said to be about US$150? Let's say travel insurance costs US$100 and the other personal stuff that I need to bring there say costs US$150. All in all, the total will be at least US$4,075. Rounding it to US$4,000, I means I need to set aside at least RM14k at the current exchange rate. And this amount is on the conservative side. It will very likely be RM15k.

This amount is way beyond my budget. Hence I don't think this trip will be possible...unless my financial circumstances suddenly improve or someone decide to sponsor my trip (which is highly unlikely). And I donot wish to spend that kind of sum on myself and having to cut down on another budget that I have set aside for my family on something that I have been said to have postponed and postponed year after year. I do not want to make my family sad or end up quarrelling with any of them if I go to Tibet and resulting in having to quarrel about money. You get what I mean? I donot want to be like one guy (whom I donot know) in e-sangha who signed up for a 3-year retreat but end up having to literarily "beg" for sponsors. I did contribute to him some money because I wanted to create positive connections for my future retreats. I hoped to have the karma (including being financially adequate) to join long retreats in the future. I donot wish to be indebted to people by collecting sponsors for own personal matters.

So this is a sad blog post for me. Well, looks like I have to shelve my own personal interest for others' again. Hey, isn't that a good thing? So I'll say this is a happy post. Or, is it happy and sad post? Or neither happy nor sad? What am I saying? LOL! Anyway, I will pray for better karma next time. Hopefully I will create some... !