In the struggle to pursue enlightenment, this sentient being has found it hopelessly embroiled in his own internal conflicts as well as struggling to prioritise between pursuing his worldly and spiritual goals. In his mind, he wished that he was like Prince Siddharta who left the life of comfort in the palace. He was sure it must had been difficult for Prince Siddharta. But why is it so difficult for him now? Is it his own karma that he has to make a worldly living and develop a family like others are doing? Or, is it his own lack of determination? He realised that he can only do it bit by bit and need the blessings from the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha in the form of the Spiritual Guru. Since the precious human rebirth may end anytime, he knows that "practising bit by bit" is not the ideal way to go. But reluctantly he has to accept it from lack of better alternatives. Hence, he feels hopeless and seeks blessings and guidance. He screams ...and wants the blessings of the Triple Gem (i.e. his hope) now. He desperately wants some blessings right now. In essence, he is expressing his mind of renunciation. Nowadays, many people can talk about bodhicitta, but what they donot know is that they have to develop the mind of renunciation first, before any true bodhicitta (the mind of enlightenment) can develop. These are mentioned by Lama Tsongkhapa in the teachings on The Three Principle Aspects of The Path.
In order to appreciate the intensity of this supplication, you need to internalise the desperation reflected in each line as your own struggle too! Is this the struggle you are in too?
A Desperate Supplication to the Guru-Triple Gem
cries by a drowning sentient being
Why in the world would I need to wake up,
And face the dreaded world?
Why in the world would I need to work,
And deal with all the craziness in the world?
Why in the world would I need to sleep
Only to wake up again?
Why not sit on the Lion’s Throne and enjoy bliss after bliss instead?
Why do I feel trapped in this body?
This flesh and bone prison.
Why do I feel trapped in this mind?
This mental prison is even harder to break.
Why do I feel trapped in a “self”?
This eternal prison, as yet, I have not seen its emptiness.
When can I achieve my freedom?
Why do I generate so much desire?
Cursed attachments that stick like glue.
Why do I generate so much anger and hatred?
This “fire” inside keeps burning.
Why do I generate so much delusion?
They just keep coming uncontrollably.
What can I do to generate only bliss?
Why do I have to go from birth to birth?
This house builder seems destined never to die.
Why do I have to bear so much pain?
Dependently arising, pain is empty, but alas, it’s still painful!
Why do I keep creating so much karma?
Stop it, stop it! I am telling myself.
How do I listen to myself?
Why do I still continue living in a world full of crazy people,
Senseless activities abound, this non-stop daily madness?
Why do I still need to make a worldly living to feed myself and others,
Fueling the engine of continued samsaric rebirths?
Why do I still prioritise worldly attainments and affairs,
And only “when I have the time”, do I pursue some dharma?
Very soon this precious human rebirth will end,
All the madness in this world will not save me from the fires of hell waiting,
Or the furs and tail that are going to grow on my body,
Or the hunger that is going to besiege me like forever,
Where is my priority?
Arrgh...! Where is my hope?
Drowning in samsara’s wide ocean,
Hands desperately grappling for Liberation,
This sentient being feels hopeless.
He cries out in desperation:
“O-Guru Triple Gem! I seek your blessings!
Quickly, quickly… come now!
Please, please…I beg of You!”
written on 28 Nov. 2008. 5.50pm, re-edited at 11.57pm. Re-edietd at about 8.30am and 9.40pm on 30 Nov. 08.