Saturday, August 2, 2008

The Immutable Being

I had a very strange dream last night (waking up on 2 Aug). In the dream, I was told to be like the immutable vajra. I donot know who told me, or maybe it just came to me... I don't know. Or, it's a secret message from my guru? Maybe, but it came at the right time when I felt that my afflictions and emotions are higher than normal. I don't know, but it could be caused by the double eclipses this month. The eclipse of the sun had happened yesterday on 1 August and the lunar eclipse is scheduled to happen on 15 August. This is the first time double eclipses had happened twice in this year. According to a local newpaper, as per an astrologer, this is a negative sign of turbulent times. I do agree somewhat with this view. Moreover, there are many studies and even in other religions that indicate that our emotions and weird behavioural aspects are somehow heightened during lunar and sun eclipses. I guess that's why I felt that my attachments and afflictions were especially high on 1 Aug. And it's going to continue on a turbulent ride throughout this month as it was in February this year whent he same double eclipse happened. I also noticed this higher than normal afflictions in the people closer to me. One person said to me that she felt somewhat dissatisfied and uneasy but donot know why.

That's why it's said that both good and bad karma are multiplied 100 million times. It should not be taken literarily as if you can count merits - 1 time, 2 times, 3 times, etc. Actually how many times it multiples also depends on the state of our mind. If it is in a proper state, our good actions, does indeed have the potential to multiply by that many times. Similarly, our bad actions. Merits are like water, how much of it we get depends on the "container" or "vessel". Your container could be smaller or bigger than mine. So, it doesnot mean, that even if our actions are the same, it will result in the same merits. And if your container is small, if you multiply it 10 times, it will not be the same amount of merit as another person who has a bigger container, but only multiply twice.

So, is it only me who noticed it or do you guys also felt a higher than usual emotional ride these days?

So, back to the "Vajra" advice.... it was a timely advice since to be like the Vajra means, to be stable mentally, physically, and spiritually in terms of practice just like the vajra. It means not to be easily shaken by things happening around you, not to let your afflictions rise easily, to be able to control our emotions (rather than response on impulse or emotionally)... You get what I mean? It doesnot mean ignoring what people say, but rather, view it critically and responding with kindness and compassion and in an appropriate way that doesnot result in more afflictions spreading.

It also means, if we are following the life of dharma properly, we have nothing to fear. Hence we should journey on in our life fearlessly.

From this simple dream, an important realisation dawned on me that Vajrasattva is the embodiment of this pure immutable being. Once we are able to realise the immutable nature of ourselves we become Vajrasattva. Vajrasattva becomes manifest in us once we realise our nature is just like the immutable substance of the vajra, i.e. indestructible, immutable. And the reason we are able to purify our negative karma is precisely because of the nature of the immutable vajra. Vajrasattva just means the Immutable Being.

With this advice, my vajrasattva mantras will take on a whole new perspective of developing this vajrabeing within. I think I will appreciate more of Vajrasattva practices and intent on taking a Vajrasattva initiation sometime in the future. I also think that I can appreciate why Lama Yeshe combined Vajrasattva practice with Heruka to become Heruka Vajrasattva. When I saw Lama Yeshe's Becoming Vajrasattva 2 weeks ago in Kikokuniya, I didnot have the urge to buy it. Now I will try get this book. Hehehehe...

This "Vajra" advice also reminded me of an advice that a friend gave me some years back. It's actually a Ch'an Buddhist saying. He adviced me to be like the mountain, big and strong, and unshaken by the blowing wind. In chinese the saying is "Ru Lai, Ru Qu, Ru Ru Bu Dong". Translated it means: "Thus Come, Thus Go; Thus Thus Unmoving". I will try to keep this advice in mind, but it is not going to be easy.

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